Learn to like: predictable non-luxe food mostly served as sandwiches. True! Things have improved. But I find it’s best to lower expectations and be happy with your cheese sandwich. To accept that appletaart will definitely be the best cake on the menu. That kibbeling or haring with raw onion and pickles eaten standing up in your winter raincoat and layers of sweaters dodging that days downpour is the Dutch equivalent of Germany and Italy’s full service market lunch counters where you can sit down, eat a hot plate of delicious whatever with real cutlery while drinking a glass of wine. Food in the Netherlands is all about limited fun.
I was told once that the roots of Dutch ‘cuisine’ are in the 17th century, when herbs and spices were banned by religious ordnance… I found this easy enough to believe. Indonesian food is pretty good though!
With the exception of the cycling this could all happily apply to Scotland too - something I've noticed as a frequent visitor. The Netherlands really isn't as culturally strange to a Scot as, say, France or Italy
All I would add is: get used to being scolded. Even by random strangers who are helpfully pointing out that, for instance, you missed a 2 for 1 offer on your shopping. They will be helpful in such an annoyed and disapproving tone that the first few times it happens you may be tempted to cry, and certainly to apologise profusely which, as you say, will earn you bafflement and further disapproval. You just have to get used to it
Funny. Since living in the NL (AMS) for 5 years, I now think the customer service in the US is too much and phony. I'd add, enjoy poffertjes and hagelslag! ;)
I laughed so much reading this, very accurate. we can add after having an overpriced cheese sandwich at a cafe sitting 2 cm away from the next customer, going to the bathroom and finding the tiniest hand wash basins ever which means that probably no one ever washes their hands and also seeing a household towel next to the basin, which means if they ever wash their hands and dry it with that towel it is even worse
If I may utter a wish Could you write a stack on dutch communication style. Even as someone growing up eat of NL , just across the border, the directness still fascinates me.
I remember how confused/humiliated I was as I waited an eternity for the check at a restaurant in Amsterdam. I would like to live in a culture where egalitarianism doesn't necessarily mean poor table service, that's the dream anyway!
This was so funny and helpful as we are going to visit a friend in the NL in April. The parts about how are you being thought of as rude is going to be my downfall. I love friendly conversation at coffee shops so I will now tamper my expectations. Thanks Kate!
Be prepared, when leaving a Dutch social situation and having announced that you’re planning to catch a train, for a prolonged discussion on the merits and demerits, and there will be some of them, rest assured, of your chosen route, and almost certainly the fare structure of the ticket that you should already possess, but probably don’t. See the comment above on the patronising voice informing you of 2 for 1 offers. “Here in The Netherlands we have a system (you bonehead foreign fuckwit) where you can better wait another 18 minutes (not 5, not 20, but 18) and change in xyz then you can get the offpeak/economy/silent carriage special train, then you will arrive maybe 4 minutes later but you will save 2 euros”. Someone will then point out that this special offer doesn’t apply to people over 65/with children/ carrying a bicycle/ on public holidays, and in fact you’d be better off spending another 1 euro 25 weekday on the only recently announced offpeak discount fare to get the intercity link via xyz, changing at abc, which will get you to your destination only 2 minutes later than your planned route. (And note the smug look on whoever says this).
These two comments can only be trumped, as it were, by someone possessing secret inside information, such as a railway employee, who will collect the pot by telling you that as you are a couple, you’d do well (can better, from the Dutch kan beter) to ignore the train today, as the line is undergoing repairs, involving the dreaded replacement bus, so just get an Uber.
Maybe this is a very strong cultural trait because I was reading a blog years ago by a Dutch-American…maybe 2 or more generations removed …and he was mentioning he drives his wife nuts by doing something like this about random trivial choices that involve spending money, and this is a Dutch characteristic. It sounds like it could drive a person nuts. I agonize over decisions but in a flighty, powerless way—if someone added this many features I would be absolutely paralyzed!
As a Dutchie I was a bit shocked about the point “Get over the shitty customer service.”
Moving to Italy, Sweden and spending a lot of time in Germany (speaking German) and Denmark I am a constant amazement when I have to fix shit with Dutch bureaucrats and companies. The customer service is amazing and honestly one of the best of Europe I have experienced so far. From DUO (student debt agency, tax office, postNL, insurance company achmea, ABN AMRO, Bol.com to muncipality, nowhere I had a long phone queue. Customer service was very friendly helpful and thinking along.
As an example I called my insurance company with a question about specification of getting a travel insurance. At the end the girl asked: “I see you call from a foreign umber, are you already abroad?” “Yes” “then please note that you need to get this insurance from the start of your trip in the Netherlands, otherwise we don’t cover. It would be a shame thinking you are covered and then actually you aren’t.” I was speechless.
Maybe I have low expectations after bureaucrats screaming at me in Italy, non-helpful customer service in Sweden, rude horeca personal in Austria. Maybe it is because I speak Dutch fluently, but I definitely think that The Netherlands has their service on point.
This post is about learning to love life in the Netherlands, the same way one learns to love anyone or anything, by accepting and even coming to appreciate its flaws. That’s not negativity. Also, I have two master’s degrees.
Learn to like: predictable non-luxe food mostly served as sandwiches. True! Things have improved. But I find it’s best to lower expectations and be happy with your cheese sandwich. To accept that appletaart will definitely be the best cake on the menu. That kibbeling or haring with raw onion and pickles eaten standing up in your winter raincoat and layers of sweaters dodging that days downpour is the Dutch equivalent of Germany and Italy’s full service market lunch counters where you can sit down, eat a hot plate of delicious whatever with real cutlery while drinking a glass of wine. Food in the Netherlands is all about limited fun.
Yes, Dutch food is rubbish. I have tried to find its upside in the two and a half years I've been living here, but in essence, it is simply fuel.
And don't get me started on "gourmetten", easily the most inaccurate term in all cuisines ever.
I was told once that the roots of Dutch ‘cuisine’ are in the 17th century, when herbs and spices were banned by religious ordnance… I found this easy enough to believe. Indonesian food is pretty good though!
That sounds extremely plausible!
Great list, also I propose watching 1980's Calve Pindakaas commercials for an insight into breakfast culture and joyful Calvinistic semi-optimism
Number 11. Always having to go three times to get something done.
With the exception of the cycling this could all happily apply to Scotland too - something I've noticed as a frequent visitor. The Netherlands really isn't as culturally strange to a Scot as, say, France or Italy
All I would add is: get used to being scolded. Even by random strangers who are helpfully pointing out that, for instance, you missed a 2 for 1 offer on your shopping. They will be helpful in such an annoyed and disapproving tone that the first few times it happens you may be tempted to cry, and certainly to apologise profusely which, as you say, will earn you bafflement and further disapproval. You just have to get used to it
This sounds VERY challenging. Whoa!
Funny. Since living in the NL (AMS) for 5 years, I now think the customer service in the US is too much and phony. I'd add, enjoy poffertjes and hagelslag! ;)
I laughed so much reading this, very accurate. we can add after having an overpriced cheese sandwich at a cafe sitting 2 cm away from the next customer, going to the bathroom and finding the tiniest hand wash basins ever which means that probably no one ever washes their hands and also seeing a household towel next to the basin, which means if they ever wash their hands and dry it with that towel it is even worse
Nothing do do with those towels but shoot them into space
The food is deadly, but the beer is to die for.
Thanks for that.
If I may utter a wish Could you write a stack on dutch communication style. Even as someone growing up eat of NL , just across the border, the directness still fascinates me.
Its very refreshing though
I know the feeling. Now when I go back to California I am far too blunt 😂
I remember how confused/humiliated I was as I waited an eternity for the check at a restaurant in Amsterdam. I would like to live in a culture where egalitarianism doesn't necessarily mean poor table service, that's the dream anyway!
I loved this, it’s brilliant!
Thank you!
This was so funny and helpful as we are going to visit a friend in the NL in April. The parts about how are you being thought of as rude is going to be my downfall. I love friendly conversation at coffee shops so I will now tamper my expectations. Thanks Kate!
Happy to help, and enjoy your time in this beautiful grey country!
Oh, all so so true!
"Wat een weer, hé?"
Be prepared, when leaving a Dutch social situation and having announced that you’re planning to catch a train, for a prolonged discussion on the merits and demerits, and there will be some of them, rest assured, of your chosen route, and almost certainly the fare structure of the ticket that you should already possess, but probably don’t. See the comment above on the patronising voice informing you of 2 for 1 offers. “Here in The Netherlands we have a system (you bonehead foreign fuckwit) where you can better wait another 18 minutes (not 5, not 20, but 18) and change in xyz then you can get the offpeak/economy/silent carriage special train, then you will arrive maybe 4 minutes later but you will save 2 euros”. Someone will then point out that this special offer doesn’t apply to people over 65/with children/ carrying a bicycle/ on public holidays, and in fact you’d be better off spending another 1 euro 25 weekday on the only recently announced offpeak discount fare to get the intercity link via xyz, changing at abc, which will get you to your destination only 2 minutes later than your planned route. (And note the smug look on whoever says this).
These two comments can only be trumped, as it were, by someone possessing secret inside information, such as a railway employee, who will collect the pot by telling you that as you are a couple, you’d do well (can better, from the Dutch kan beter) to ignore the train today, as the line is undergoing repairs, involving the dreaded replacement bus, so just get an Uber.
Cue change of topic. Off you go, none the wiser.
Maybe this is a very strong cultural trait because I was reading a blog years ago by a Dutch-American…maybe 2 or more generations removed …and he was mentioning he drives his wife nuts by doing something like this about random trivial choices that involve spending money, and this is a Dutch characteristic. It sounds like it could drive a person nuts. I agonize over decisions but in a flighty, powerless way—if someone added this many features I would be absolutely paralyzed!
As a Dutchie I was a bit shocked about the point “Get over the shitty customer service.”
Moving to Italy, Sweden and spending a lot of time in Germany (speaking German) and Denmark I am a constant amazement when I have to fix shit with Dutch bureaucrats and companies. The customer service is amazing and honestly one of the best of Europe I have experienced so far. From DUO (student debt agency, tax office, postNL, insurance company achmea, ABN AMRO, Bol.com to muncipality, nowhere I had a long phone queue. Customer service was very friendly helpful and thinking along.
As an example I called my insurance company with a question about specification of getting a travel insurance. At the end the girl asked: “I see you call from a foreign umber, are you already abroad?” “Yes” “then please note that you need to get this insurance from the start of your trip in the Netherlands, otherwise we don’t cover. It would be a shame thinking you are covered and then actually you aren’t.” I was speechless.
Maybe I have low expectations after bureaucrats screaming at me in Italy, non-helpful customer service in Sweden, rude horeca personal in Austria. Maybe it is because I speak Dutch fluently, but I definitely think that The Netherlands has their service on point.
Jane - my husband is Dutch and I keep having to explain why he is not "good fellow glad met" but he really a good guy.
Have a look at the following from a PhD American living in the Netherlands who is def8nitely not as negative as are you
https://youtube.com/@dutchamericano?si=iiyug6TlhSb_8DY-
This post is about learning to love life in the Netherlands, the same way one learns to love anyone or anything, by accepting and even coming to appreciate its flaws. That’s not negativity. Also, I have two master’s degrees.